Kissing Sin (Riley Jenson Guardian #2) - Page 5

Memories reeled through a sea of agony, fractured images of a violent movie, viewed through a broken projector. The car that had hit mine from behind; the tree I couldn't avoid. The warm flush of blood on my face and arms, then pain, and darkness, and the sensation of floating. Nothing but floating, for what seemed like forever.

Then sounds crept into the mix. A steady beeping. The click of heels against flooring. The slap of flesh against flesh, and the sense of violation.

Finally, smells. Antiseptic. Sex. Forest, pine and orange blossom.

The last three were a strange combination I'd smelled before.

Riley!

The voice was distant. Demanding. It echoed through the agony locking my mind, nipping like a terrier. But the pain swirled, and I couldn't tell where the voice came from. Couldn't reach it.

Riley!

It was sharper this time, more urgent. The clouds of agony stirred, dissipating. Suddenly, Quinn was in my mind, standing between me and the pain, holding out a ghostly hand I clasped it, and it felt real, and solid, and oh so warm.

This way, he said, and led me back to the light.

Awareness returned, and I gasped.

"Its all right." Rhoan's voice was soft, soothing. His arms were wrapped around me, and he was rocking me as a father would a child "You're all right."

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The air that swirled around us was cool against my fevered skin, and the air I sucked fiercely into my lungs filled with the scent of eucalyptus and night. We were outside again.

I opened my eyes. Quinn's gaze met mine, dark depths as expressionless as his face.

"The door wasn't open," I said.

"No," he agreed softly.

"Door?" Rhoan said. "Which door?"

I pulled my gaze from Quinn's and looked at my brother. "Nothing. It doesn't matter " But it did matter, because Quinn had just breached my shields and entered my mind after telling me not so long ago that he couldn't.

Rhoan touched a hand to my cheek. "Did you remember anything important?"

"Just a smell. A man, someone I've met before."

He raised an eyebrow. "Nothing else?"

I shook my head, and he sighed. "Enough is enough. We're taking you home tonight."

And I was ready to go. Ready to just sleep and forget, if only for a few hours. "Is it safe to go home?"

He grimaced. "Not really. The three of us are heading to a safe house for the time being. When Jack and Kade sort out the mess here, they'll join us."

"Why is Kade staying rather than you or Quinn?" I asked, surprised.

"Because Kade was here for over two months, and knows this place better than any of us."

Which sounded perfectly logical, but I wasn't believing it. Jack had plans for Kade, that much was obvious. "So where is this Directorate safe house? And has it got a bath big enough for a werewolf to laze in?"

He grinned. "It's a penthouse suite in a hotel right on the shores of Brighton beach. I think it's safe to presume it has a decent size bath."

A smile tugged my lips. "Well, I guess if we're going to be locked up, we might as well do so in style."

"Exactly. You okay to stand?"

I nodded, and he helped me to my feet. I wobbled a little, and was glad of his support those first few seconds. "I'm fine," I said, when I was.

He released me. "I'll just go see Jack, then we can leave."

I nodded and leaned back against the concrete wall. The coldness crept through my sweater, and felt so good against my overwarmed skin.

Once he'd left, I looked at Quinn. "You have some explaining to do."

He shrugged. "There's nothing sinister in what happened. You were in great pain, and your psychic shields were low. I simply slipped past them."

"That time I was shot with the silver bullet, you said you could read no more than surface thoughts. This time it was more than that."

He studied me for a second, dark eyes glinting dangerously in the night. "What did you want me to do? Stand back and watch you suffer needlessly?"

"You lied to me." Again.

"Only a little."

I crossed my arms. "I've got a feeling your version of little and mine are two entirely different things."

"It's only when you're in pain that your shields are lowered enough for me to enter uninvited. In some respects, your mind is almost as untouchable as your brother's."

I didn't believe him. "So you're saying it's only when I'm sick or injured that you can rifle through my thoughts?"

He hesitated. "Yes."

"Liar. When else?"

He looked away. "In times of passion. If I chose to, I could enter then."

Anger curled through me. "And have you?"

"No."

I only had his word on that, and right now, I wasn't up to trusting his word. "Well, thanks for pulling me out of that mess of memories, but if you ever pry into my mind without invitation again, I'll – " I stopped. What could I threaten a vampire with? Especially one as old as Quinn apparently was?

"Fine." His voice was flat. Cold. "Next time, I'll let you find your own way out."

"Good."

Silence fell between us. A silence that was tense and unbreathable. But I wasn't entirely unhappy about it, because it gave me an excuse to ignore my hormones, and keep him at arm's length that much longer.

Still, I stared up at the cloud-filled night sky, and hoped like hell my brother hurried back. Naturally, he didn't, and the silence itched at my skin until I felt ready to scream in frustration.

When he finally did get back, he hooked his arm through mine and began guiding me away from the building. "Let's get going. You look beat."

"That's because I am." I yawned hugely, then added, "How are we getting to this place?"

"There's a helicopter waiting. It'll take us to the Directorate's jet, which is being prepped as we speak."

"Good. I need sleep."

"You can once we reach the plane."

Which I most certainly did. And when we reached the hotel, I slept some more. Only I didn't just sleep, I dreamed. And while this dream was new, it was similar to many I'd had since Quinn had walked away from me in Talon's lair.

Well, I think they were just dreams, though they felt pretty damn real.

I was in a shower. Water sprayed against my skin, the needle-sharp jets soothing and yet exhilarating. Or was it the warmth of another body so close, the scent of sandal-wood and man, that had my pulse racing?

Hands touched me, turned me, then lips came down on mine, lips that were warm and familiar and oh so wonderful. We kissed, long and hard, as the water drummed our skins, skimming our bodies, tickling and teasing.

Then he turned me, so that my back was against the hard heat of his body, his erection nudging my butt as he reached for the soap and began washing my breasts and belly. The scent of lavender touched the air, filling every breath, and it seemed so real, as real as the hands that were washing me so lovingly.

And oh, it felt good.

But being caught between the heat of his body, the drum of the water, and the caress of his hands was nothing short of tortuous, and I was pretty much steaming in an instant.

When I could stand it no more, I grabbed the soap from him and turned around. His beautiful body gleamed like sculptured pale-gold marble in the half-light of the bathroom, the water reverently caressing every muscle, every curve. I followed the water's lead, soaping every marvelous inch, until he was quivering as badly as I.

He took the soap and put it back in the holder, then twined his hands in mine, raising them above my head as he pressed me back against the wet, cool tiles. The heat of him flowed around me, through me, burning my skin and contrasting sharply with the coolness seeping from the tiles.

His gaze met mine, the obsidian depths gleaming with lust and determination. "You are mine, Riley," he said softly, as he nudged my legs wider with one knee. "And I have every intention of loving you so completely – in every single way possible – that you will have no desire to turn to anyone else but me."

"That won't ever happen."

But it came out little more than a pant of air as he slid into me, filling me, liquefying me. His thick groan of pleasure was a sound I echoed. Then he began to move, and there was nothing gentle about it. His body and movements were urgent, fierce, and so very wonderful. The rich ache grew, becoming a kaleidoscope of sensations that washed through every corner of my mind. Then the shuddering took hold and I gasped, grabbing his shoulders, clambering up his body to wrap my lees around his waist and push him deeper still. Pleasure exploded between us and my orgasm ripped through my body, shuddered through my soul.

I woke, still shaking in the aftermath of that orgasm, Quinn's name dying on my lips.

For several seconds I simply lay there, staring almost blindly up at the ceiling.

God, it had felt so real. My skin still tingled from the drumming of the water, and the scent of lavender seemed to hang in the air. Not to mention the fact I felt well and truly sated.

Where the hell had dreams like that been during the few brief dry spells in my love life?

I stretched like a contented cat, then looked at the clock on the bedside table. It was nearly noon. I'd barely slept six hours, which was surprising. It felt like I'd slept twenty.

I rose up on my elbows. I couldn't actually remember how I'd gotten into bed last night but given the trail of clothes from the doorway, I'd obviously walked and stripped at the same time.

The room itself was huge. Directly in front was a curved wall of glass. Sunlight flooded in, lending the sand-colored walls an extra richness. The carpet was thick, and sea blue in color, as were the two well-stuffed sofas. To the left was a door that led into a tiled area, and what looked like the biggest damn shower ever made – though it wasn't the shower from my dream. But this one had obviously been designed with a party in mind, and I was definitely going to try it out.

Of course, my hormones were all for trying it out with a friend, but who that friend would be was the million dollar question. Common sense said Kade, but after the dream, my hormones were all for sampling a real bit of wet vampire loving.

Which probably meant I'd do neither. It was certainly the saner, if less fun, option right now.

I Bung off the covers and paddled into the oversized bathroom, enjoying the luxurious shower alone and spending a whole lot more time than necessary simply standing under the water, letting the jets massage my skin and warm my body.

When the water finally started to cool, I stepped out. Once I'd dried myself, I went to search for clothes. And discovered several dresses and skirts hanging up in the wardrobe. Rhoan had obviously gone shopping, because everything was new, even the shoes. I frowned, hoping he hadn't blown our entire savings account. Rhoan and shopping were always a dangerous combination, and he'd overspent and landed us in trouble come rent time more than once.

Seeing the day was so warm, I picked out a flowing white cotton dress that had shoestring straps, a low back, and a hem that swirled almost indecently around my thighs. After slipping my feet into a pair of cute red and white sandals – complete with a wooden stiletto heel, which had certainly come in handy a few times in the past when I'd been caught in situations that required something more persuasive than a mere fist, but less deadly than a werewolf's teeth – I headed out to find the kitchen, Quinn, and my brother.

I found Quinn sitting in the living room, reading the newspaper. His gaze was a caress that slid down my body, and one that had me hot and bothered in an instant. God, what was it about this vampire that could get to me so easily? Okay, he was gorgeous, he was rich, and any woman with half a brain would fuck him in an instant – but there was something else between us. Something deeper.

His gaze slid back up to my hair. "You've cut it."

I nodded, surprised he hadn't noticed earlier. "Yeah. Summer's coming on, and shoulder length is easier to manage."

"It suits you."

"Thanks." I walked into the kitchen, and smelled the caffeine before I found it. "You want a coffee?"

"Yes, thanks."

I poured two then headed back out, handing him a cup before moving over to the window. Ten floors up had my stomach stirring uneasily, but I was careful not to get too close to the edge. If I couldn't see the drop, I'd be okay. Port Phillip Bay stretched out before me, filled with whitecaps that moseyed toward the shore. But given the way the trees tossed, those gentle waves were no indication of the wind's strength. I watched a beach umbrella tumble along the yellow sand, then turned and asked, "Where's Rhoan?"

"He had to go into the Directorate to chase down some files for Jack."

"Then Jack and Kade aren't back yet?"

"No."

I wondered if that was a good sign or a bad sign. Wondered if they'd uncovered anything useful in that place. Somehow, I was doubting this. This whole operation just seemed too slickly run for clues to be left behind haphazardly.

"Any idea how long we're going to be cooped up here?"

He shook his head and folded the newspaper one-handed. "No. Could be a while from the sound of it." His voice was as polite as mine, but his gaze kept slipping down my body and his hunger stirred the air. Hunger that was both sexual and blood need.

"Have you eaten lately?" I asked sharply.

He hesitated. "No."

"Why not?"

He raised an eyebrow. "What does it matter to you?"

"It matters because I can feel your need to eat."

He shrugged. "There's synth blood in the fridge. That'll do for a while."

"In the long run, you can't survive on synth blood."

"No. When that happens, I shall go seduce someone."

Oh yeah. I'd forgotten he only took blood while making love. "Don't leave it to the last second."

He studied me for a moment, then said in a neutral voice, "I have lived more years than I care to remember as a vampire. I don't need a pretty pup telling me what I should be doing."

"This pup was only showing a little concern." I turned away. "I should have known better."

He was silent for a while, but his gaze burned into my back, and slithers of awareness scattered across my skin.

"Can I ask a question?"

"What?" I kept my voice as flat as his.

"Are you wearing any knickers under that dress?"

I almost choked on my coffee. Of all the things I'd been expecting him to ask, it wasn't that. "That's for me to know, and you to wonder."

"Well, I'm certainly wondering. And in case you're wondering, that dress is practically see-through when lit by sunlight."

I hid my smile and walked over to the sofa. "Sorry if the view is annoying you."

He gave me his vampire face, but underneath, frustration reigned. I could feel it, even if I couldn't see it.

"Why are you determined to take everything I say the wrong way?"

"Perhaps it has something to do with being a little pissed off at you." I grabbed the newspaper as I sat down.

"When you've stopped being pissed off, are you actually going to listen to what I have to say?"

"I don't know." I unfolded the paper. "Maybe."

"And when might that be?"

I shrugged. "Let's see – I spent a good month trying to talk to you and getting rejected. So I think a month would be fair payback."

"And here I was thinking bitchiness was beyond you."

"In case you are forgetting, I was born a bitch."

My gaze caught the front page banner, and I almost had a heart failure when I saw the date.

"It's Friday?" I asked, looking at the time. It was nearly two-thirty.

"Yes." He frowned. "Why?"

"I slept a whole day?" I stared at him in disbelief.

A smile touched the corners of his dark eyes. "Yes, you did."

"Shit." I ran a hand through my hair. "I have a doctor's appointment at four."

He frowned. "Rhoan never mentioned it."

"Rhoan never knew about it. I made the appointment the day of the accident." I surged to my feet. "Wonder if he thought to retrieve my handbag and wallet from the car wreck?"

"You can't go to this appointment," Quinn said, following me into the bedroom.

"You try and stop me, and you'll regret it."

He crossed his arms, and leaned against the doorframe. And even though I was hunting around for my handbag, I was acutely aware of his presence. Of the tightness of the jade shirtsleeves against his forearms. The way his khakis defined his hips and groin.

"What is so important about it that it cannot wait until it's safe to venture out?"

"That is none of your business." I found my wallet, but no handbag. Not that it mattered. All I needed was my credit and insurance cards.

I walked back to the door, but Quinn didn't move.

"Get out of my way."

"You can't go out alone. At least let me come with you."

I didn't want Quinn there. Didn't want anyone there. Not when this might be the very worst news I'd ever hear. "I'll be all – "

"No." His voice was cold. Determined. "Not alone. I either escort you there and back, or you remain here."

"Escort, not come in."

He nodded, and moved aside. I walked into the living room and scrawled a note for Rhoan. "What time is he due back?"

"He wasn't sure. Could be late." Keys jangled behind me. "He left us a Merc in case we needed it."

When the Directorate had personnel go under safe cover, they obviously didn't do it by halves. "Fine. Let's go, then."

We took the lift down to the basement, and walked across to the penthouse parking bay. Quinn did the gentlemanly thing and opened the door, ushering me inside before climbing into the driver's side.

For a good ten minutes, he didn't say anything. I stared out the window, thinking about the future, and hoping like hell I actually had something decent to look forward to.

"What is the appointment for?" he asked, eventually.

"As I said, that's none of your business."

"Are you ill?"

I snorted softly. Part of me wished I was ill. It would be better than probably being sterile. "No."

"Then why a specialist?"

Annoyance ran through me, and I glanced at him. "You have no right to ask these questions."

"And no right to care?" he bit back. "You're a fool if you think that I don't."

I wasn't a fool. His caring had always been in his touch, and occasionally, in his eyes, even when his words had denied the possibility. But I couldn't afford to dwell on it, because right now I couldn't afford to do exclusive with a vampire. And he would want exclusive, even though he hadn't actually come out and said it.

"Quinn, I'm not up to dealing with what you want right now." Not when I had tried. Not when I had far bigger problems.

He didn't say anything, and we continued on in silence. He asked for the address once we reached the city, and pulled to a halt outside the Collins Street building. Ignoring the "no standing" signs, he parked the car then got out, walking around to open the door.

I ignored his offer of assistance, and looked up at the thirty floors above me. Dr. Harvey was on the twentieth, which was something of a stretch for my fear of heights. And while, technically, that fear shouldn't appear when I was in a building with four walls all around, it didn't seem to matter a damn to my stomach. Last time, I'd almost puked every time I'd looked out the doctor's office windows. And the lift ride back down to ground level had left me shaking and sweating. Not an experience I was looking forward to reliving.

"Are you sure you're going to be all right?"

"Of course. I'm not ill, as I said."

"I guess not," he replied shortly. "Even though you've gone as white as a sheet."

"My doctor is on the twentieth floor." And he knew about my ridiculous fear of tall, tall buildings and their awful elevators.

"You want me to accompany you in the lift? It might be easier if you have company."

I shook my head and ignored the caring in his voice. "I have no idea how long I'll be."

"I'll be waiting in the foyer."

"Fine." Tightly gripping my wallet, I walked past him and into the building. I didn't get far.

"Riley?"

I froze, recognizing the rich tones, knowing who it was even before I turned around.

Misha.

My ex-mate, and the very last person in the world I wanted to see right now.

He rose from the chair and strolled toward me, a tall, lean figure who caught the eye as much for the gracefulness of his movements as the expensive cut of his clothes. The sunlight streaming through the glass turned his silver hair a rich, burnished gold, but nothing could warm the cold calculation from his icy eyes.

"Misha," I said, glad to hear my voice was even. "What are you doing here?"

"Waiting for you." He stopped when there were several feet between us. His familiar, musky scent swam around me, stirring memories of all the good times we'd had together. Memories that might just be a lie, like everything else from that period of my life had been a lie.

I raised an eyebrow. "And how did you know I'd be here this afternoon?"

"Easy. There aren't many doctors specializing in nonhuman fertility problems. I merely hacked into the computers of the half dozen listed here in Melbourne, and went through their files until I found you."

If Misha knew about my fertility problems, then he was involved in whatever was going on deeper than I'd thought. "And why would you be doing that?"

"Because I needed to talk to you, and I doubted whether you'd come to me willingly."

He was only half right. I wouldn't go to him willing, but I'd certainly fuck him willingly once he'd made the first approach. He – or rather, the information he could give me – was my path back to a normal life. "You and I have nothing to talk about."

His smile was warm, yet it did little to lift the calculation in his eyes. "Oh, I think we do."

I glanced past him, looking at the clock on the wall. "I have an appointment in ten minutes. You have three to say what you came here to say."

He raised an eyebrow, his expression mocking. "Then I will get straight down to business. I know Talon was giving you ARC1-23. I know why. And I know the results."

I raised an eyebrow. "And here I was believing when you said you had nothing to do with Moneisha or Genoveve."

"I didn't. But we both know that Talon giving you the drug had nothing to do with either of those places. Or anything else he was involved with."

Jack was right. This wolf knew a whole lot more about what was going on than any of us did. "He'd been trying to get me pregnant."

"As was I."

I blinked. "What?"

He shrugged. "Talon and I have been competitors for a long time. I thought it would be interesting to see what sort of child you and I could produce."

There was more behind his decision than just a competitive urge. I could see it in his eyes. "You're both mad."

"Maybe. It was certainly a risk on my behalf."

I frowned. "Meaning what?"

"Meaning, Talon was given no specific instructions other than to fuck you senseless in an effort to learn more about Jack. I, on the other hand, was told to keep away." Humor briefly touched his eyes, warming the chill depths. "I thought you worth the risk."

Yeah, right. I was really believing that. "I'm not in the least bit flattered. And why would it be risky for you to fuck or impregnate me?"

"As I said, I was ordered to stay away."

"So who gave these so-called orders?"

He gave another shark smile and sidestepped the question. "Did you know Talon was sterile?"

I nodded, and surprise flitted briefly through his eyes. "Interesting, because Talon certainly didn't."

"Talon thought himself the perfect specimen."

My voice was tart, and Misha's smile warmed, becoming genuine for the first time. "He was never one to see his faults."

"And you are?"

He shrugged. "It pays to know one's faults. That way you can work around them." He studied me for a minute, the warmth of his smile fading, sending a chill skittering across my skin. "I have a proposition for you."

"I don't want to hear it." Such a lie, but one Misha fell for hook and sinker.

"Oh, I think you will once you go up and see your specialist."

My heart lodged somewhere in my throat, and refused to budge. For several seconds, I couldn't even breathe. "What do you mean?"

He raised a pale eyebrow. "My proposition has benefits for you, the Directorate, and myself. More than that I am not willing to say right now." He glanced at his watch. "My time is officially up. If you wish to discuss this matter further, ring me on this number." He handed me a card. "It's the only secure line I have left."

I glanced at the handwritten number, quickly memorizing it before tearing the card into strips. "Don't be expecting me to."

He smiled, and turned away. Then he stopped and looked over his shoulder. "One more thing you should know."

Trepidation crawled through me. "What?"

"I haven't had the hormone chip replaced. Right now, I'm the most fertile wolf you know."

With that, he turned and walked away, leaving me dry mouthed and shaking. God, what was he saying? That I could have kids? Why else would he say something like that?

There was only one way to find out. Spinning, I all but ran to the lifts, my stomach churning so much that the twenty floor climb didn't really make a noticeable impression.

As usual, Dr. Harvey was running behind schedule, leaving me sitting in the waiting room, twitching and shifting and sweating.

When the nurse finally called me in, I all but ran.

Dr. Harvey looked over his black-framed glasses at me. "You're looking a little peaked this afternoon."

I sat down on the chair and crossed my legs. "I'm worried." No lie there, that was for sure. "These results may well change the direction of my life."

He nodded in understanding, his gaze flicking to the com-screen on one end of the desk. I shifted, but couldn't quite see what was on the screen.

"Would you prefer the good or the bad news first?"

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Hit me with the bad." Might as well know the worst first.

"There's no easy way to put this, so I'll say it straight out. Indications are that within a year or so, your body will fully imitate a vampire's in that you will neither be fertile nor be able to carry a child."

I simply stared at him. Deep down, I guess I'd always expected something like this would happen. Rhoan might be more vampire in his makeup than wolf, but we were fraternal twins, sharing the same father if not the same seed. Yet I'd always hoped that because past tests had indicated the werewolf gene was stronger in me, I'd be able to have a child. Or would at least be able to turn to some form of IVF when all else failed. Now even that was snatched from me, and I wasn't sure whether to laugh or to cry.

Though right now, both were looking good.

"The good news," he continued, as if he hadn't noticed me sitting there in a lump of misery, "is that the experimental drug you were given has actually achieved its aim. Young woman, your cycle has finally kicked into gear, and you are actually menstruating for the first time in your life."

I stared at him for several long minutes. "No, I'm not."

He smiled. "Yes, you are. If the results we got back were any indication, you should have had your first period six days ago."

Six days ago I'd been barely alive. "I can't remember."

He raised his eyebrows at that, but didn't question. He knew I was Directorate. Knew some things just had to be accepted without question. He clasped his hands in front of him. "Of course, given that you are no longer taking the drug, I would envisage the effects will not last very-long. A last burst, perhaps, before infertility."

I blinked, and suddenly his words hit me. Ohmygod. I could have kids. I was fertile, however briefly. I felt like screaming. Dancing. Running through the building shouting the news.

"Of course," he said, his voice full of a sternness that somehow kept me anchored, "we will have to keep a close eye on what is happening, and run weekly tests. If you do become pregnant, it might mean hospitalization, as we cannot predict how your body, with the changes it is undergoing, will react."

I didn't care if I had to be hospitalized the whole nine months. Not if it meant having a child at the end of it. I shifted on my seat, and had to resist the impulse to ring Rhoan and tell him the news. God, he'd be over the moon!

"And," the doctor continued, "because you have such a narrow margin of fertility and will need to ensure maximum opportunity for pregnancy, you will have to watch your body's chemical and physical changes, and ensure the sexual act occurs during hours of peak receptiveness."

"And the monitoring involves… ?"

"These days, it involves nothing more tedious than wearing a small monitor under your skin. It'll tingle softly to warn you when a peak has been reached."

I nodded, and wondered if I was grinning like a fool.

"Remember though, that even this machine cannot guarantee conception. It may be that you will not fall pregnant, especially given your history. There is never any certainties when it comes to life, even in this day and age."

"I have a chance, Doc. That's all I wanted."

He nodded. "Then you wish to have the monitor implanted immediately?&qu